Tagged: happiness

What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Going Through a Breakup or Divorce

Comforting friend

“Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them…your smile, your hope and your courage.” ~Doe Zantamata 

Divorce or the end of a long-term relationship is one of hardest, if the not the hardest, trial you …

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Why Self-Help Shouldn’t Be About Trying to “Fix” Yourself

Why Self-Help Shouldn’t Be About Trying to “Fix” Yourself

Not Broken

“Stop trying to ‘fix’ yourself; you’re not broken! You are perfectly imperfect and powerful beyond measure.” ~Steve Maraboli

The other day I had some time to kill before a meeting, so I decided to go to one of my favorite …

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4 Ways We Resist Life and Cause Ourselves Pain (and How to Stop)

4 Ways We Resist Life and Cause Ourselves Pain (and How to Stop)

Peaceful woman

“When fear wakes up inside, and there is no place to run away or hide from it, consider it a gift. In all the glory of that discomfort, know there is refuge in surrender.” ~Erin Lanahan

When I was a …

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Overcoming Codependency: Breaking the Cycle of Unhealthy Relationships

Overcoming Codependency: Breaking the Cycle of Unhealthy Relationships

Couple holding hands

“A codependent person is one who has let another person’s behavior affect him or her and who is obsessed with controlling that person’s behavior.” ~Melody Beattie

From a young age, I felt insecure in my own skin. I was a …

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How to Live Out Loud: 8 Lessons for an Authentic, Empowered Life

How to Live Out Loud: 8 Lessons for an Authentic, Empowered Life

Happy handsome man smiling on the beach

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Growing up, I was shy, bullied often, or ignored because I couldn’t stand up for myself.

My parents, …

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How to Turn Your Sensitivity into Your Biggest Strength

How to Turn Your Sensitivity into Your Biggest Strength

“Never apologize for being sensitive or emotional. Let this be a sign that you’ve got a big heart and aren’t afraid to let others see it. Showing your emotions is a sign of strength.” ~Brigitte Nicole

We have a problem …

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How to Instantly Calm Yourself in Stressful Situations

How to Instantly Calm Yourself in Stressful Situations

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” ~Victor Frankl

There’s a big lie we tell ourselves during stressful times.

It …

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Your Body Isn’t Perfect – Neither is Mine, Judging Isn’t the Answer!

 We as humans have a strong tendency to judge each other’s differences. There are all types of people in the world, but most important of all, we each carry the same stuff inside. If you’re that perfect, cast out the 1st stone and see who judges you for once.

There’s no such thing (as told in the media) as a perfect body, perfect looks, perfect mind, or perfect personality. When you think about the body, it contains; bacteria, toxins, acid in the stomach, and other nasty stuff. All of which are not considered “beautiful”. As a person who’s body has been against me since I was born, I truly understand what beauty really means.

Not matter your body type, looks, height, weight, colour, are all perfect inside. I know this because we all have the ability to love. Some love more than others, some less than you, but all with the capacity for compassion.

When you judge someone on their looks, you know what you’re really saying? You haven’t learned enough in life to realize you’re the one that might have the problem, not the person you’re judging.

“Perhaps, if you weren’t so busy regarding my shortcomings, you’d find that I do possess redeeming qualities, discreet as they may be.  I notice when the sky is blue.  I smile down at children.  I laugh at any innocent attempt at humor.  I quietly carry the burdens of others as though they were my own.  And I say ‘I’m sorry’ when you don’t.  I am not without fault, but I am not without goodness either.” ― Richelle E. Goodrich

Judging Someone Won’t Make Things Better:

All too many people go around hating others for what they; wear, their appearance, the way they walk, talk, colour their hair, shoes they wear, piercings, and tattoos. Their indifference towards people is so shocking, it speaks truth about them. They too are on a constant mental mission, battling their own daemons from within.

If you find yourself constantly needing to make fun of others, I dare you to ask a stranger to tell you what they think of you. Careful now, you might not like what they say, don’t get angry, this is just your own medicine coming back to bite you. I’m sure you don’t have the courage to ask someone, because deep down you’re afraid of what people might say, which makes it easier to belittle another soul as to have power over them and to ensure they don’t judge you accordingly.

I don’t get angry when people judge me, I feel sorry for them since I know in my heart, deep down they are insecure about themselves, which is why they deem it necessary to make fun of my life, who I am, but the truth is they didn’t have the right in the first place. Knowing this allows me to smile and say to them; “I’m sorry you feel so badly towards yourself, I can help you with this if you let me.”

“I would never disrespect any man, woman, chick or child out there. We’re all the same. What goes around comes around, and karma kicks us all in the butt in the end of the day.”– Angie Stone

Before You Say Anything, Be Mindful of Your Thoughts:

(Before you hate, delegate your actions!)

Bad habits can be broken, but it takes determination and the willingness to change. To be a good person takes more courage, than to be the opposite. Have the courage to stand up for people, especially those who are bullied and made fun of because of their appearance, you might just realize that from that one act of kindness, you may have made a best friend for life.

The moment you think of something to say to someone that might humiliate them, think about what you’re about to say. Think to yourself, why am I doing this? Who is this benefiting? Will my actions help or hurt this person’s life? Do I have a right to destroy this person’s feelings? If you can honestly go through with it (hating them publicly) and make fun of that person after truthfully answering those questions, you should seek professional help, or spiritual help.

Our souls are beautiful, when you act against your loving nature, something happens inside. A chemical imbalance begins to form, you’re being starts to hurt, and your mind goes to war, your heart screams for forgiveness. Denying your soul the right to be true as intended sends you down a path of hate, which in many cases can be very difficult to climb out of.

“I have to be careful because there is something destructive within me, I think, and I can have a tendency to just search for the kicks. I can’t really get too close to someone who’s too destructive, or too dark, because then I might go down the rabbit hole myself.”– Alexander Skarsgard

Are Your Friends Influencing Your Decisions?

I understand that sometimes we do things because we see our friends do the same. Hanging out with; negative, judgmental, hateful, or outspoken people can influence your thoughts more than you know. Having these people as friends changes you; it controls your actions in ways that will harm others. Haters hate, compassionate people attract compassion, lovers attract loving people, etc.

If you know deep down you don’t like who you’ve become, change the people that influence you. The mental battle within is only going to get worse, deep down, you know this to be true. Truth can set you free. Is dropping your friends easy to do? I’m not going to fluff it for you, no absolutely not, but I live by a saying that’s helped me with this process:

“Either you change with me, or you lose me to change!”– Martin R. Lemieux

When you let good feelings and compassion back in, you’ll notice the people you attract will be at the same vibration level and think as you do. You’ll also notice; food tastes better, you will smile more, you’re relationships will have deeper meaning and you will no longer have the need to make fun of others.

Forgive yourself for your actions, ask for forgiveness, move on, and be true as you were meant to be.

Namaste!

Martin R. Lemieux

Cutting the Spiritual Energy Cord – Relationship Releases

In all relationships, there’s the physical, the mental aspects and the spiritual side of things. No matter what kind of relationship in your life, all three (physical, mental, and spiritual) are always present. A person, who’s left your life, has started this three stage process.
These stages are crucial for you to; move on, let go, not get hurt, prevent you from being hurt further, or just a way to break free of the strangle hold they have on you.
It is scientifically proven that energy bonds are made in all relationships. This relieves all the nay-sayers who don’t think this stuff exists. Please do your research, before you brush this topic off as false.
When you’re emotionally connected and investing in someone, all of your energies combine. Depending on the level of the relationship, this bond can be extremely strong and stay with you for your entire life.

The key to breaking the bond between you both is to follow these steps:

1) Physical:

The physical break is the easiest to do. By simply not seeing each other breaks this tie together and prevents new types of energy sharing between the two of you (above and beyond already transferred and shared).
Other connections also affect this stage, for example, if you just broke up with your ex, the friendships you made together can go both ways. Some may be on your side, others might not. Determining which ones to trust is very tricky and very important not to cause drama. The best thing for you is to only speak to your most trusted friend. The less people involved in your recovery, the less drama it will cause.

 

2) Mental:


The mental game is a hard one to let go, I wrote an article that will help you with this stage titled: “Emotional Release, Things to Expect.” Please read this article once you’ve finished cutting the cord. Even after you cut the cord, it still takes effort to break or “release” the mental, emotional bond that the heart needs to take time to mend.
3) Spiritual:
Surprisingly this stage can be the easiest and most effective to help with the release process. Each time you make a connection with someone, there’s an exchange of the spirit, the energy bond. This bond is a two-way stream of; giving and receiving energy.
3.1) Abusive Relationships – Spiritual Attack of the Soul:
In most abusive relationships, this energy bond is destructive to the person on the receiving end because the energy flow is mainly a one way street. The “abuser” is not only draining you of energy, but sending you negative energy to break down your spirit. This process empowers the abuser and weakens the abused.
An abusive relationship MUST be cut from the spiritual side, a person who has done you harm; physically, mentally, and spiritually can continue to attack you long after they are gone. I’ve seen this 1st hand what affects this has on a person’s psyche.
I’m sure for some of you, the statement from above just hit home. Many of you have probably wondered why your abuser has been in your thoughts, feelings, and nightmares. They still have a bond with you, even after they are gone. That is why it’s so imperative that you cut this nasty cord for good.
3.2) Family, Friends, & Normal Relationships – Negative Energy Takers:
In every person’s journey, at one point or another we all come across a family member or friend we must let go of, for all sorts of reasons. Naming those reasons isn’t really relevant, but the process is just as hard as letting go of an abusive relationship.
Although it might be a lot harder to cut the spiritual cord consciously, it’s necessary to help mend your mind and soul, which also helps to build a new bond, a fresh start later on when you’re ready.
Cutting the spiritual cord doesn’t mean it cannot be re-attached, in fact, sometimes cutting the cord allows two people to start fresh, start over and helps one or the other to finally see things clearly.
Now that we’ve cleared up the “what” this cord does and means, let’s get onto the “how” to.

HOW TO CUT THE SPIRITUAL CORD – STEP PROCESS:

A) Must be done out of love, no exceptions. Cutting the cord out of hate might help to only strengthen it, giving you a false representation of what’s actually being done. Remember you’re doing this out of love for; yourself and the other to move on safely.
B) When cutting the cord, make sure you’re in your most calming, relaxed space, the one place you can go to unwind and be alone for a few minutes. A certain room, outside near a tree, a park, your car, or even your bathroom if you have to.
C) It takes a certain amount of visualization for this process. I like to meditate for a few minutes to calm the mind and help prepare my spiritual shield and energy. If you have problems visualizing in your mind, get a photo of the person to help enhance your connection.
D) Now visualize an energy cord that connects from you to the other person. In most cases, it’s tied to your belly like an umbilical cord, but NOT always, so make sure you see where the cord is attached to. Some people might have it connected to; the mind, the heart, the belly, or other. If you cannot see where it’s attached, imagine then – that’s it’s attached to your belly.
E) While visualizing, you must remember to do this out of love. See the person about 5-9 feet in front of you, the cord is attached to the same place for both of you, now visualize a sharp object and slice through the energy cord. Do this three separate times; see the cord again and again cutting the cord.
F) For the last time you see the cord, imagine your heart sending a pink energy to the other person’s cut end and send the pink love energy to the tip of their cord to close and mend it.
G) Once complete, look at the person and see them leaving the room (KEY). Our souls can hang on without the cord, especially in long-term relationships that have gone through a great deal.
H) Make sure the person leaves the room, you might have to mentally force them to leave, even ask them to please leave.
I) Once the person has left, imagine the sun sending you a colourful energy beam to your heart which will mend your heart, don’t stop there if possible, imagine the sun beam to engulf your entire body, physically turn your head towards the sun to take it on directly.
J) Smile before opening your eyes as to say goodbye to that person and slowly open your eyes.
It’s not uncommon to have a sudden rush of emotions after this process, please let the emotions run through you, do not block them. Those emotions are all the emotions the two of you had connected with each other. If you feel like crying, do not stop. If you feel rage, yell at the wall as loud as you can to let it all out.
Make sure to re-hydrate your energy afterwards, drink an entire freezing cold glass of water. Water is the best conduit for your body’s energy flow (proven fact). This process can be draining and it’s important to drink lots of water, listen to your body. If you’re hungry, eat something healthy and satisfying.
You’ve now learned the process to cut the spiritual cord with a person to truly let them go out of your life, OR to re-build a new cord to help a fresh new journey together.
I wish you all the best!
Namaste!

Martin R. Lemieux