Tagged: Relationships

The Best Divorce Advice I Learned the Hard Way.

The Best Divorce Advice I Learned the Hard Way.

The thought of life alone was terrifying. My ex had been my everyday, my meaning, my purpose. His family was my own, his friends, his dreams. I had nothing. No savings, no security, no back-up plan. As discussions began and we considered amicably parti…

Overcoming Codependency: Breaking the Cycle of Unhealthy Relationships

Overcoming Codependency: Breaking the Cycle of Unhealthy Relationships

Couple holding hands

“A codependent person is one who has let another person’s behavior affect him or her and who is obsessed with controlling that person’s behavior.” ~Melody Beattie

From a young age, I felt insecure in my own skin. I was a …

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6 Reasons Why Being Alone Is Much Better Than Being with a Person Who Doesn’t Deserve You

There are many reasons why being alone is much better than being with the wrong person. Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who doesn’t deserve you? I have and I know what it feels like. Being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t treat you like a loving partner would treat you, […]

Traits of a strong mom

8 True Traits of a Strong Mom

We’re not talking “Tiger Mom” here, where intense focus is directed at excellence in child performance. Rather, what signs indicate maternal prowess that is, simply put, strong? Buy an “Intelligence is sexy” t-shirt! I confess to bias.  I think  more often than not, “strong Mom” or “strong woman” is, well,  redundant. Still, I’m curious to discover common behaviors that inform parenting rich with core values. Some maternal influence that cultivates character. So let’s call them  instead, “ mindful Moms”,  present,  far from perfect,  compelled by Mama Love. 1. Mindful Moms have confidence in themselves, and naturally encourage the unique individual within

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6 Ways Heartache Pain and Loss Can Make You Better

6 Ways Heartache Pain and Loss Can Make You Better

Not long ago my Mom passed.  Unexpectedly, 2 short weeks later,  my younger brother joined her.  Bereft,  I was suddenly adrift, my moorings gone.  How to belong in a world with mother and brother sized holes?  Sleepless, I walked, and walked. Or, crashed for 8, 10, 12 hours. Grief morphed into guilt, anger, cynicism, bewilderment. Socially inept, I lay low.  In my brother’s flannel shirt, I curled under Mom’s soft brown throw and convulsed with tears.  Each salt trail marked a sacred path, a new road named “Goodbye.” Buy an “Intelligence is sexy” t-shirt! I moved furniture, rearranged with neurotic

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Cutting the Spiritual Energy Cord – Relationship Releases

In all relationships, there’s the physical, the mental aspects and the spiritual side of things. No matter what kind of relationship in your life, all three (physical, mental, and spiritual) are always present. A person, who’s left your life, has started this three stage process.
These stages are crucial for you to; move on, let go, not get hurt, prevent you from being hurt further, or just a way to break free of the strangle hold they have on you.
It is scientifically proven that energy bonds are made in all relationships. This relieves all the nay-sayers who don’t think this stuff exists. Please do your research, before you brush this topic off as false.
When you’re emotionally connected and investing in someone, all of your energies combine. Depending on the level of the relationship, this bond can be extremely strong and stay with you for your entire life.

The key to breaking the bond between you both is to follow these steps:

1) Physical:

The physical break is the easiest to do. By simply not seeing each other breaks this tie together and prevents new types of energy sharing between the two of you (above and beyond already transferred and shared).
Other connections also affect this stage, for example, if you just broke up with your ex, the friendships you made together can go both ways. Some may be on your side, others might not. Determining which ones to trust is very tricky and very important not to cause drama. The best thing for you is to only speak to your most trusted friend. The less people involved in your recovery, the less drama it will cause.


2) Mental:

The mental game is a hard one to let go, I wrote an article that will help you with this stage titled: “Emotional Release, Things to Expect.” Please read this article once you’ve finished cutting the cord. Even after you cut the cord, it still takes effort to break or “release” the mental, emotional bond that the heart needs to take time to mend.
3) Spiritual:
Surprisingly this stage can be the easiest and most effective to help with the release process. Each time you make a connection with someone, there’s an exchange of the spirit, the energy bond. This bond is a two-way stream of; giving and receiving energy.
3.1) Abusive Relationships – Spiritual Attack of the Soul:
In most abusive relationships, this energy bond is destructive to the person on the receiving end because the energy flow is mainly a one way street. The “abuser” is not only draining you of energy, but sending you negative energy to break down your spirit. This process empowers the abuser and weakens the abused.
An abusive relationship MUST be cut from the spiritual side, a person who has done you harm; physically, mentally, and spiritually can continue to attack you long after they are gone. I’ve seen this 1st hand what affects this has on a person’s psyche.
I’m sure for some of you, the statement from above just hit home. Many of you have probably wondered why your abuser has been in your thoughts, feelings, and nightmares. They still have a bond with you, even after they are gone. That is why it’s so imperative that you cut this nasty cord for good.
3.2) Family, Friends, & Normal Relationships – Negative Energy Takers:
In every person’s journey, at one point or another we all come across a family member or friend we must let go of, for all sorts of reasons. Naming those reasons isn’t really relevant, but the process is just as hard as letting go of an abusive relationship.
Although it might be a lot harder to cut the spiritual cord consciously, it’s necessary to help mend your mind and soul, which also helps to build a new bond, a fresh start later on when you’re ready.
Cutting the spiritual cord doesn’t mean it cannot be re-attached, in fact, sometimes cutting the cord allows two people to start fresh, start over and helps one or the other to finally see things clearly.
Now that we’ve cleared up the “what” this cord does and means, let’s get onto the “how” to.


A) Must be done out of love, no exceptions. Cutting the cord out of hate might help to only strengthen it, giving you a false representation of what’s actually being done. Remember you’re doing this out of love for; yourself and the other to move on safely.
B) When cutting the cord, make sure you’re in your most calming, relaxed space, the one place you can go to unwind and be alone for a few minutes. A certain room, outside near a tree, a park, your car, or even your bathroom if you have to.
C) It takes a certain amount of visualization for this process. I like to meditate for a few minutes to calm the mind and help prepare my spiritual shield and energy. If you have problems visualizing in your mind, get a photo of the person to help enhance your connection.
D) Now visualize an energy cord that connects from you to the other person. In most cases, it’s tied to your belly like an umbilical cord, but NOT always, so make sure you see where the cord is attached to. Some people might have it connected to; the mind, the heart, the belly, or other. If you cannot see where it’s attached, imagine then – that’s it’s attached to your belly.
E) While visualizing, you must remember to do this out of love. See the person about 5-9 feet in front of you, the cord is attached to the same place for both of you, now visualize a sharp object and slice through the energy cord. Do this three separate times; see the cord again and again cutting the cord.
F) For the last time you see the cord, imagine your heart sending a pink energy to the other person’s cut end and send the pink love energy to the tip of their cord to close and mend it.
G) Once complete, look at the person and see them leaving the room (KEY). Our souls can hang on without the cord, especially in long-term relationships that have gone through a great deal.
H) Make sure the person leaves the room, you might have to mentally force them to leave, even ask them to please leave.
I) Once the person has left, imagine the sun sending you a colourful energy beam to your heart which will mend your heart, don’t stop there if possible, imagine the sun beam to engulf your entire body, physically turn your head towards the sun to take it on directly.
J) Smile before opening your eyes as to say goodbye to that person and slowly open your eyes.
It’s not uncommon to have a sudden rush of emotions after this process, please let the emotions run through you, do not block them. Those emotions are all the emotions the two of you had connected with each other. If you feel like crying, do not stop. If you feel rage, yell at the wall as loud as you can to let it all out.
Make sure to re-hydrate your energy afterwards, drink an entire freezing cold glass of water. Water is the best conduit for your body’s energy flow (proven fact). This process can be draining and it’s important to drink lots of water, listen to your body. If you’re hungry, eat something healthy and satisfying.
You’ve now learned the process to cut the spiritual cord with a person to truly let them go out of your life, OR to re-build a new cord to help a fresh new journey together.
I wish you all the best!

Martin R. Lemieux